If you’ve ever participated in any ski resort festivities, you recognize the importance of keeping a retro snowsuit on call in your closet. For those who haven’t, it’s like this: for just a few days each season, your skills on the slopes come second to your style. On these occasions that the goal is to represent a time when neon was “in” and onesies reigned supreme. Keeping that in mind, here are a few of our favorite recent eBay finds–in no specific order–that fit the bill:
This fantastic piece scores style points for multiple reasons. Firstly, it’s hot orange and was designed by Stan Herman. We say, “Way to go, Mr. Herman.” This was made to be seen. No, really. There is a line of reflective material running down each sleeve. Adding to the practicality of the ensemble are the side zips that run straight up to the knees. Who says you have to put your ski boots on after your snowsuit? We like to have options. What really sold us this design was the words “Federal Express” stitched just above the incredibly useful oxford-reminiscent front pocket. That’s right. Nothing says retro like referencing the old name of a popularly nicknamed company. And let’s face it, it brings to mind fantastical mental pictures of FedEx workers delivering packages to the slope side cabins on skis.
Next is an Obermeyer suit for women. The Mardi-Gras-inspired colors and exposed zipper immediately draw the eye in, but it’s the waist-cinching, multi-colored belt that makes this a winner. It gives the illusion of sporting voluptuous shoulder pads without actually having to defile your style. And ladies, it’s 18% off! But don’t second-guess the buy, because it’s off the market in under 24 hours. Did I mention there are stirrups?
3. The Animal
Fila isn’t to be overlooked with their pink and purple tiger-striped number. From the waist up, it’s all about the blend of graceful horizontal color patches that would act as camouflage if the trees you were skiing through were pink and filled with checkered flags. One glance at the wearer will let people know what’s on her mind. Two…wait–three words: “free,” “skiing,” “style.” The starting bid is $9.99. There’s no downside to this purchase. From the looks of it, it even comes with a vintage Vail Resorts ski pass attached in case someone questions your decade of motivation.
Don’t worry, guys, we didn’t forget about you. This model is a steal at $50 for the starting bid. With a one-shouldered design, wearing this says, “I’m all business” from the left and “I like to party” from the right. Rock this with a mullet, and people won’t know if you’re ready to break it down in the boardroom or on the dance floor of the lodge. If you’re looking for something to attract women, I think you just found it.
As you consider you options for next season’s Retro Days, check out the best of eBay. When you make a purchase, it feels like you’ve won a game. Is it similar to what Lindsey Vonn feels when sails past the finish line a record speed or when Shaun White realizes he’s earned the first perfect Winter X SuperPipe score? As a person who writes about these types of accomplishments, I can honestly say, it’s possible. Get out there and win something. Retro Days are yours for the taking.
Feature Photo credit: ESPN.com/Erik Seo. All other photos: eBay.com